Its like he divulged his secret and then decided, nah I'm actually bi? Though I would have liked a Barbie Doll, as she had just come out. By the way I love the picture of the cat. Great to hear the 'other'perspective.
I am the other side of your situation, i have just outed myself to my husband and after some time to reflect he has begged us not to separate. Thanks for all of your posts and supportive comments.
Dan 26, thanks for clarifying about the one old letter per week. I encourage you to seek help with dealing with this situation. After finding his Badoo account that was sending notifications to our sons phone, me finding pictures of sexual acts- I was shattered.
But seriously, As dating a gay guy transguy more marriages than just a smart lady, if that was me, I'd be pretty cranky and just be like, "don't insult my emotional intelligence buddy" it just seems like his body and mind has responded very severely to what he now says, is bisexuality. She had the nerve to say I instigated the end of our romance, when really, I did what she was about to do anyway, I could see it.
I have been trying to blame other things such as adapting to fatherhood and work and financial stresses but ultimately I think it's my sexuality that is the key thing getting to me. Of course it's confusing.
So in these cases, someone's gender identity is being elevated above someone else's sexual desire for certain kinds of bodies. Considering the discrimination trans people face on a daily basis, it comes as no surprise that trans people are overlooked when it comes to dating. But I think it is much more common to continue hiding it, burying it, and conforming.
Good luck with moving on Esti-you do deserve to be you and to Def-how eloquently you expressed my situation and I do appreciate your support. Of course she would say that it's going to feel worse, the moment immediately after breaking up always does.
I think most guys in our situation would tell you that they have gained much more than they lost in a whole-of-life view. I like the regular repeats: I can sometimes see if my thinking has changed, or simply enjoy reading a classic letter or response, and it's a good way to loop new readers in to the now-very-large back catalog of Savage Love there are people in college now who weren't born yet at the time I started reading Savage Love as a teenager on the back page of The Onion when they still had a print As dating a gay guy transguy more marriages than just and were operating out of a shitty office in Madison; gods, I'm not even that old yet, and I'm already doing the bygone era bit.
How much sex you're having now, and how much time you take to transition will not change this fact. Which is a rather nasty way of making the other person someone shallow and bad. I am now on my second marriage and a good bit older than you so I might be seeing things a bit differently but, for what it's worth, I think marriages only truly work if both partners are honestly happy and fulfilled in the marriage - and I mean honestly and I mean both.
Thanks to justinok and Paul for your valuable comments. I wish you well. I bear no malice,just want everyone to be their true selves.